‘The name’s Spayde, Ham Spayde P.I.G. That stands for Porcine. Investigative. Gumshoe. I’m a private investigator from Ham Flancisco, and if you’re wondering, my late mother named me after this great town. I lost my father during the Boar Wars, so I’m a loner of sorts. I have plenty of enemy’s to a sprinkling of friends, if that’s what you can call them. I maybe cheap to hire, but I sure as hell get the case done, my way! And one more thing no one touches the fedora’